Tips for a succesful year

Whether you have just arrived, or are in your extension year, it's good to remember some basics for having a good au pair experience. Communication is the basis for any good relationship. You should feel free to tell your host family how you're feeling and ask questions about anything you don't understand. It's not always easy to have an honest conversation, but it is important! Equally important is mutual respect. Don't forget that your host family has trusted you with their most precious possessions: their children. But also don't forget to treat their home, car and other possessions with respect. At the end of your stay your room should look much like it did when you arrived. Your host family should also respect you and understand how difficult it can be, coming from another country and culture. (If they forget - remember to use a little of that communication!) If you ever feel there are difficulties arising that you can't handle by
yourself, please call me. I'm here to help!

Expectations

We all have expectations going into our au pair/ host family relationship and the key to a successful year is communicating these expectations. We cannot assume that either party knows what we are thinking, feeling or wanting. We spend a few weeks or months communicating over Skype and email so we should have a fairly good idea of each others personalities but meeting in person and living under the same roof brings up many new things and if we do not communicate with each other small things become enormous and hard to deal with. We has a host family need to provide good guidelines in a written format to the au pair of what the hours are and what we expect of the au pair. When they have time off and when they are expected to work for us, what kind of chores we would like them to do around the house and no this does not include cleaning your whole house, au pairs are not a maid service. But they can help around the house, kids laundry, clean up dishes, light vacuuming, pick up kids rooms, etc
Au pairs need to ask questions and communicate back to the host family what their expectations are, can they use the car for social purposes, will the family provide a gym membership, who pays for the gas in the car, extra vacation time, all these things are perks but we all need to talk to each other and understand where each side is coming from.

When we had our first au pair ten years ago we were very green! I made a lot of mistakes, i did not have a schedule written out for her, I did not have all the essentials in her room, radio, CD player, TV I just thought I would wing it, it would all be okay. I quickly learned she was unhappy and she wanted to leave, not because she did not like us but because we were not prepared. Thankfully our area director then helped out and made us communicate and see things from both sides. We ended up having a wonderful year together. So I cannot stress how important COMMUNICATING is

Great class for your Child and Au Pair

If you are looking for something fun for your au pair and child to do together sign up for a Kinder Music class. Both my children have taken classes and loved it. Kinder Music with Joy is a great resource. They offer classes in Overland Park,KS and Brookside, MO  Here is a link to their website
http://www.kindermusikwithjoy.net/
This is a great way for your aupair to learn English by singing with your child. Music has no language barriers and is a great way for your child and Aupair to bond.

Good Bye party for your Aupair

I get this question from time to time what to do for the Aupair when they leave. Some families go out for a special dinner and some have a party. I have always thrown a party for my aupairs when they leave. Most of mine have left during the summer so it is an easy time to do a backyard barbeque. There are times when you have two aupairs over lap and throwing a party is a good way to welcome one as you say good bye to the other. Our parties have ranged from just a few close friends to a big Brazilian blow out that lasted until 4 in the morning. Whatever you decide to do, doing something special for a person that has been a part of your family for a year and taken care of your children is important.

On that note here are a few photos of some of our area aupairs that are leaving now. They have spent a successful year in Kansas City and they have been wonderful aupairs. Two of them will now be returning to Germany.Bon Voyage and thanks for being great aupairs.

Male aupairs

I came across a new movie the other day that is about a Norwegian aupair and takes place in Kansas, what are the odds. Here is the link check it out
http://aupairkansasmovie.wordpress.com/
This brings up the point of male aupairs, since the aupair in this movie is a male. I often get a look of surprise from people when I tell them that there are male aupairs. I think it is great that men are taking an active role in child rearing and what a great way to do it at an earlier age. And no not all male aupairs are gay. There are not many male aupairs but the ones that do make the choice to become an aupair have a great year and as a rule have less issues than their female counterparts. We look forward to welcoming our first male aupair to Kansas city ( it has been a long time since we had one) this summer. Male aupairs are particularly popular in families with active boys, a male au pair will not mind spending hours in the backyard playing soccer, they tend to bond more easily with the children and the family and there is far less drama. Very few male aupairs leave the program. A male aupair may not be the best fit for all families but is something for families to consider.
I have no idea what this movie "Aupair Kansas" will be like but check it out if you have time. It will show in Kansas City on Saturday April 9th at 7:45pm at the AMC in the power and light district.

Infant Specilized Aupairs

I was in the New York airport the other day and saw a girl with a blue Aupair Care bag on her shoulder looking very lost. I walked up to her and introduced myself as an Aupair Care area director and asked if I could help her. She looked at me in amazement and asked if I was her area director, thinking I had come all the way to New York to help her out. I said I worked for the company in Kansas City but I noticed her Infant specilized tote bag from Aupair Care so I offered my help. She was headed to Washington DC to be an aupair, taking care of new born twins. I was also headed to DC so we chatted and I helped her with her bags. She was from Spain and I hope she will have a great year in America.

Cultural Tip

From time to time I come across some cultural differences that need to be pointed out and they are not the obvious. So I will post them here. They are important for Aupairs and Host families because they are usually topics we do not like to talk about. So today's topic is "where does the toilet paper go after you have used it?" In America the answer is obvious...the toilet right? But in South American countries the toilet paper goes in the waste basket in the bathroom. The reason may be that the plumbing there is not as good as here, maybe that is just what they are used to, who knows but the first time it happens you kind of wonder. I now know this little piece of information and it is okay, each culture has different things that we do. Now I know what to do when I go to Brazil and they will not look at me strangely because i threw the toilet paper in the toilet.

Our First Au Pair Gitte

Our first Au Pair was wonderful, though we had a rocky start! We were new to the Au Pair thing and we just had our first baby so we were not the best host parents in the beginning. I had not thought of all the things that would be nice for the Aupair to have in her room, a radio/CD player ( this was pre ipods) a TV, plenty of storage place for her things...So the Aupair was a little upset with us the first few weeks. Thanks to our wonderful area director at the time we worked it out. The Area director came over and talked with us and talked with the Aupair and we all realized we were not communicating our expectations of each other very well. After the Area director left we sat down and had a good conversation I took the Aupair to Target for a shopping trip and after that all was great. She was a wonderful Aupair and great with our baby. She cooked some great dishes and baked up a storm. She cleaned from time to time... but the best thing about her was we could trust her with our baby and she was a great addition to our extended family. Gitte is all grown up now and she is married and has had her first baby.

Our Au pair Experience (Part 1)

Having an au pair has been a great experience for us.  I grew up with au pairs starting when I was born until I was a teenager. We had 11 different girls  as I was growing up. Now that I am an adult I have also had many au pairs, we have had 8 girls to date. The difference between the au pairs  I grew up with and the au pairs my daughters are growing up with is that all of the au pairs I had as a child were all Norwegian. Back then there was no agency and there were no strict visa regulations. We brought Norwegian girls with us to be au pairs for a year. My family is from Norway and we lived in many places around the world and we hired au pairs in Norway and brought them with us to the country we were living in, Moscow, Washington DC and Vienna were our three main places where we lived. The greatest difference between having au pairs then and now is that there was no agency and no support for either the aupair or the family. I remember as a child some of the girls we had were not so good, they were homesick, or drank on the job or brought their boyfriends over while they were working and once we brought them to our family we were in a sense stuck with each other. We also had great girls during those years that I remember fondly and some of whom I am still in touch with.

So when my daughter was born I knew that having an au pair was the natural choice for us. It is flexible, enriching and an affordable option for childcare. I also wanted to bring an aupair over from Norway and carry on the tradition of my childhood. But I quickly found out that we live in a different world now with far more regulations and you cannot just hire someone in another country and bring them to America. My mother contacted an Au pair agency in Norway  (because I still had my heart set on a Norwegian girl)  and she found the partner company to Aupaircare. So when my daughter was born I contacted the San Fransisco office and the process of finding an aupair started. I met with my area director and she did our home interview and got us started on the process of finding an au pair. She was a wonderful area director and made me feel so comfortable with the whole process and I knew she would be there to help us through the year. So this is how our family came about hiring an aupair and adding to our new and extended family from around the world. And our first au pair was not Norwegian but we got a wonderful Danish girl.

Child care that fits you

Having an Aupair  is flexible, affordable, and a great cultural exchange experience for your family.